Much Appreciation

I'm going to try and get back in to this whole blogging thing. Much has been on my mind, and I suppose this could be a "healthy" way of letting it out.

Lately I've been finding my mind thinking about things that I really don't want to be thinking about, let alone concerned with. But... it still goes there whether I want it to or not.

One of the things it tends to venture towards is the BD's lifestyle. Or maybe opportunities is the better word. I find myself thinking "How come he gets to go on vacations to New York and California and I don't? That's not fair." Or "Why is it he always knows that I will be there to care of our children when he isn't able to? How come that's not the same for me? That's not fair."

But then things like tonight happen. I go into the bedroom to make my way to the bathroom, and what do I see when I look at my baby girl? Her jams on the floor (ya know? the ones she was wearing when I put her to bed earlier this evening) and her blankie covering her nakey body. And I had to check... and yes, her diaper was still on. She is known to completely undress whenever she wants to, diaper included.

Seeing her like that made me realize that if I lived the lifestyle the BD does, I would miss out on all these "little moments." Those moments that make me smile when no one else is around to see it. The moments that make me laugh and cry because they are just too precious to ever forget. The moments that I would never get back if I took trips to New York or California. I realized, I have it much better than that.


I get to watch my babies grow up :)


So in a way, maybe I should... thank him?? Because of him, and his chosen lifestyle/opportunities/priorities (whatever you prefer to call it), I have a much greater appreciation for the life I have chosen and the way I have chosen to live it... with my kiddos.